Sunday, February 05, 2006
Superbowl Diary
11am: decide I am definately not watching the superbowl tonight
12am: reiterate to myself that i am not watching the superbowl
1pm: decide if I were to watch the superbowl, I would cheer on pittsburgh since it is a city more in need the help.
5pm: start thinking about how the commercials are supposed to be good.
5:15: what if there is another bearing of breast, cannot miss pop cultural phenomenon.
5:30: wonder what time the Superbowl starts, 8pm, 9pm?
5:50: oh shit, ten minutes.
6:00: convince Bukola to watch with me.
6:34: decide that I will cheer on Seattle since their uniforms are prettier.
6:53: ooh. that Pittsburgh guy has frizzy hair just like me. I am told he is a safety by one of the commentators. He is a missle, that is what he is.
6:55. Yay touchdown. Oh, un-yay. Man, I really wish the Eagles were in this game. Green is so much prettier in turquoise. On the latest Project Runway, Michael Kors said that Green is the new black. But he might have been being sarcastic, I could not tell.
6:58: Yay, field goal. I feel like the Phily kicker is really good. so I have always had a special place in my heart for kickers. I could be wrong.
7:05: ok, first funny commercial, the diet pepsi one where they use diet coke as the stunt double.
7:07: so the seattle player is running and all his teammates are blocking the people who are racing toward him. Man, I just figured it out. As a blocker, that is what you are supposed to do. Go after the people going after the runner. Man, if only I had known while playing SLAP football. I would have been so much better.
7:17: Note to Monster.com, chimps are hot inherently funny, you have to do something funny with them. well, I guess unless everyone watching the commercial is really drunk...
7:20: interceptions are my favorite part of Football. don't know why.
7:25: How long a team has had control of the ball is my favorite football statistic. still don't know why.
7:27: Kermit, Green is the new black. Michael Kors said so. Although I still have not figured out if he was being sarcastic. Also, fuck Ford.
7:33: I think the ref is named Bill Levy, making him a jew. Well, I am glad there is at least one representative of my people on the field.
7:40: boo touchdown. Man, see this is why I hate sports. I get into it. And then I get all upset.
7:41: Challenge?
7:41:30: hot overstock lady. Come on, that was not funny.
7:42: It is Bill Levy hands. I trust him.
7:43: A useful statistic. Bill Levy is the least likely to overturn something on the field
7:43: Pittsburgh Touchdown. I hate sports.
7:54: ok, so this is what i do not get. Why are the reporters from the field women? Do they think the coaches and players will be nicer to women? But shouldn't the women be hot them? I am scratching my head. (see that was funny, because the commentators kept using the phrase I am scratching my head to explain how they did not understand the Seattle strategy of not taking an extra play before kicking and I used it here)(yes, explaining jokes is still funny).
8:07: I need a pop culture moment right now to make watching the Superbowl worth it. Come on, someone take your pants off.
8:11: Mick Jagger is wearing tight black pants with black sneakers in front of millions of people. Why isn't that stylish when I wear it?
8:27: Wait, is John Madden of the tv commentary the John Madden of the video game? I would have thought he was less corny.
8:32: Bukola spilled orange juice, I was eating rice krispie treats and suddenly there is another touchdown. See, I always manage to miss the best parts even when I am trying not to.
8:33: Bukola thinks all my typing is law school homework. I would tell her the truth but I am afraid she will make fun of me.
8:41: When I took tennis lessons as a kid I was taught that it was bad manners to cheer for unforced errors. You only cheer for winners. Those Pittsburgh players who were cheering on the missed field goals should have known that.
8:52: Fuck yeah. I love interceptions. And sports.
8:54: Yay! touchdown. Jeremy Stevens is a lovely name.
8:55: The Jackasses twist that monster.com did was sort of funny.
9:04: John mdden just said "In the mold of lost and desperate houswives, grey's anatomy. Grey's anatomy, it is just a great show." He has clearly never seen the show in his life and knows nothing about tv. Man, I might have thought he was cool.
9:17: At first I did not understand why ABC would put on such a woman's show after the superbowl. But now I think it is brilliant. ABC knows it will get the men to watch the superbowl regardless, by having Grey's anatomy post-superbowl it guarantees women will watch the whole thing. I mean a good 20% of the reason I am watching this thing is because I figured I had to turn on the second half anyway to make sure that I did not miss Grey's anatomy.
9:27: sigh, touchdown.
9:40: I am sick of this. I just want the game to end and Grey's anatomy to start.
9:58: This is the time to make super-magical plays, Seattle. But instead they just keep throwing it away.
10:02: I am never cheering for another team again.
10:13: Hey, these are really sweet speeches.
12am: reiterate to myself that i am not watching the superbowl
1pm: decide if I were to watch the superbowl, I would cheer on pittsburgh since it is a city more in need the help.
5pm: start thinking about how the commercials are supposed to be good.
5:15: what if there is another bearing of breast, cannot miss pop cultural phenomenon.
5:30: wonder what time the Superbowl starts, 8pm, 9pm?
5:50: oh shit, ten minutes.
6:00: convince Bukola to watch with me.
6:34: decide that I will cheer on Seattle since their uniforms are prettier.
6:53: ooh. that Pittsburgh guy has frizzy hair just like me. I am told he is a safety by one of the commentators. He is a missle, that is what he is.
6:55. Yay touchdown. Oh, un-yay. Man, I really wish the Eagles were in this game. Green is so much prettier in turquoise. On the latest Project Runway, Michael Kors said that Green is the new black. But he might have been being sarcastic, I could not tell.
6:58: Yay, field goal. I feel like the Phily kicker is really good. so I have always had a special place in my heart for kickers. I could be wrong.
7:05: ok, first funny commercial, the diet pepsi one where they use diet coke as the stunt double.
7:07: so the seattle player is running and all his teammates are blocking the people who are racing toward him. Man, I just figured it out. As a blocker, that is what you are supposed to do. Go after the people going after the runner. Man, if only I had known while playing SLAP football. I would have been so much better.
7:17: Note to Monster.com, chimps are hot inherently funny, you have to do something funny with them. well, I guess unless everyone watching the commercial is really drunk...
7:20: interceptions are my favorite part of Football. don't know why.
7:25: How long a team has had control of the ball is my favorite football statistic. still don't know why.
7:27: Kermit, Green is the new black. Michael Kors said so. Although I still have not figured out if he was being sarcastic. Also, fuck Ford.
7:33: I think the ref is named Bill Levy, making him a jew. Well, I am glad there is at least one representative of my people on the field.
7:40: boo touchdown. Man, see this is why I hate sports. I get into it. And then I get all upset.
7:41: Challenge?
7:41:30: hot overstock lady. Come on, that was not funny.
7:42: It is Bill Levy hands. I trust him.
7:43: A useful statistic. Bill Levy is the least likely to overturn something on the field
7:43: Pittsburgh Touchdown. I hate sports.
7:54: ok, so this is what i do not get. Why are the reporters from the field women? Do they think the coaches and players will be nicer to women? But shouldn't the women be hot them? I am scratching my head. (see that was funny, because the commentators kept using the phrase I am scratching my head to explain how they did not understand the Seattle strategy of not taking an extra play before kicking and I used it here)(yes, explaining jokes is still funny).
8:07: I need a pop culture moment right now to make watching the Superbowl worth it. Come on, someone take your pants off.
8:11: Mick Jagger is wearing tight black pants with black sneakers in front of millions of people. Why isn't that stylish when I wear it?
8:27: Wait, is John Madden of the tv commentary the John Madden of the video game? I would have thought he was less corny.
8:32: Bukola spilled orange juice, I was eating rice krispie treats and suddenly there is another touchdown. See, I always manage to miss the best parts even when I am trying not to.
8:33: Bukola thinks all my typing is law school homework. I would tell her the truth but I am afraid she will make fun of me.
8:41: When I took tennis lessons as a kid I was taught that it was bad manners to cheer for unforced errors. You only cheer for winners. Those Pittsburgh players who were cheering on the missed field goals should have known that.
8:52: Fuck yeah. I love interceptions. And sports.
8:54: Yay! touchdown. Jeremy Stevens is a lovely name.
8:55: The Jackasses twist that monster.com did was sort of funny.
9:04: John mdden just said "In the mold of lost and desperate houswives, grey's anatomy. Grey's anatomy, it is just a great show." He has clearly never seen the show in his life and knows nothing about tv. Man, I might have thought he was cool.
9:17: At first I did not understand why ABC would put on such a woman's show after the superbowl. But now I think it is brilliant. ABC knows it will get the men to watch the superbowl regardless, by having Grey's anatomy post-superbowl it guarantees women will watch the whole thing. I mean a good 20% of the reason I am watching this thing is because I figured I had to turn on the second half anyway to make sure that I did not miss Grey's anatomy.
9:27: sigh, touchdown.
9:40: I am sick of this. I just want the game to end and Grey's anatomy to start.
9:58: This is the time to make super-magical plays, Seattle. But instead they just keep throwing it away.
10:02: I am never cheering for another team again.
10:13: Hey, these are really sweet speeches.
# posted by Julia @ 6:24 PM 
Comments:
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1. this is hella entertaining
2. i take it as a personal affront
3. you were right on in the beginning. You need to root for blue collar cities because they need you to root for them. these people live by their sports teams! Put it this way, pittsburgh radio is still stuck in 1979, the last time they won something. Dont you want them to at least know about Michael jackson, nirvana,rap music?
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2. i take it as a personal affront
3. you were right on in the beginning. You need to root for blue collar cities because they need you to root for them. these people live by their sports teams! Put it this way, pittsburgh radio is still stuck in 1979, the last time they won something. Dont you want them to at least know about Michael jackson, nirvana,rap music?
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